Memories...

I'm not exactly sure why...but, I've been thinking about a lot of special memories of special people lately.  This was possibly brought on by my Uncle David's birthday on October 17.  If you don't know this, my Uncle David passed away in June of 2007.  June 25 and October 17 are tough days because my mind and heart are always flooded of sweet, funny memories of my Uncle David...but let's go back a little further...we'll come back to Uncle David for sure...

My Aunt Susie was my Mom's older sister.  My mom is the youngest of three.  Aunt Susie was the oldest, then Uncle Sam, then my Momma...yep, Mom is the youngest of three (and my Uncle Sam claims that she was spoiled rotten, however my Mom says that Uncle Sam was rotten because he was the only boy...yadayadayada...).  Anyway, I have very fond memories of spending time in the summers with my Aunt Susie.  She was a librarian, and she would set me loose in a middle school library when I was only in elementary school.  I completely blame my love of reading on her...she loved books and loved to read too.  She gave me so many fun experiences as a child...we went to Disney World (and I got in BIG trouble because I managed to slip away from her during one of the parades...I was just trying to get a closer look, but she was SO mad because for just a brief second, she didn't know where I was - I think that's the only time I remember her getting REALLY upset with me).  We would go to the mountains and go "mining" in those gem mining places where you ran the dirt through the water to find the gems.  I loved doing that, and for years I kept all the sapphires, rose quarts, amethyst, and even a few small emeralds that she and I found together.  Her house was always...and I am not kidding...always messy.  She saved everything and just made piles and piles of stuff everywhere.  I never remember eating a meal at her house - probably because we wouldn't have any table space and she couldn't find any clean dishes to cook with...but we ate lots of Hardee's butter biscuits for breakfast.  She never married...and I'm glad because I had her all to myself for those precious summer visits.  Her world revolved around her nieces and nephews.  She always showed up to birthday parties with gifts for everyone...she got everyone goldfish one year!  Once we moved to South Carolina, she visited a lot.  One year, she was there for Easter.  Mom & Dad got up to head off the sunrise service and they let Brandt and I sleep late.  Of course, when I got up, I was looking for what the Easter bunny left...but there was nothing!  Of course, she quickly told me to go back to bed...that the Easter bunny was running late!  Then all I heard was frantic scurrying around and the rustle of the plastic covered Easter baskets.  She and I were kindred spirits...I knew she loved me and we loved our time together.  When I was in late elementary school, Aunt Susie was diagnosed ovarian and cervical cancer.  My last memories of her are very vague...not nearly as clear as the happy memories, and for that I am thankful.  I remember she was very weak...and I didn't visit her in the hospital.  When she was staying at my Grandmother's house...we went to visit.  She looked so frail, but she wanted to know all about 6th grade and I brought my shiny, new clarinet to show her - she even tried to play it.  She wanted to know what book I was reading in English class and we talked about "Where the Red Fern Grows."  I remember the gown she was wearing that day...it was pink with little flowers...and I remember thinking that she looked so small and weak.  We buried Aunt Susie on Christmas Eve of my sixth grade year.  I remember what I wore to the visitation and funeral.  I remember the dress that Aunt Susie was buried in.  I remember getting stuck sitting beside my cousin, Chris...and his knee shook up and and down the entire funeral.  I don't remember what was said or sung.  And that was it.  I often wonder what would have happened if Aunt Susie would have lived.  I know that she would have been so proud of all that my cousins and I have accomplished.  She would have been the one to edit my thesis for my Masters degree and Chip's doctoral dissertation.  I know that she would have loved my husband, Brad...and he would have loved her.  I know that she would have been crazy about my boys and my cousin's children.  I know that she would have still been burning up I-20 to get to South Carolina every moment that she could.  I hope that God has maybe given Aunt Susie a sweet, little glimpse into our family's lives...she'd be so proud and so happy.  If not, we'll have a lot to tell her one day.

Earlier, I mentioned my Uncle David.  Uncle David was my Daddy's oldest brother.  Daddy is one of four children...Uncle David, Daddy, Uncle Dean, and Aunt Dianne.  Uncle David passed away in June of 2007...and I was not ready for that phone call.  First, let me give you a few memories...there are way too many to tell...I was born in a time in Uncle David's life where he needed someone to love him unconditionally...and who better than a cute little baby girl.  Stories are told about how my Uncle David had a super-long beard and I would snuggle up in his beard and go fast to sleep.  He would walk up and down the hallway at my grandparent's house, walking me to sleep while I snuggled up in that beard.  I think he was proud to be an uncle.  At this point, he did not have any children of his own, so I guess I filled a little void for him.  When we lived in Georgia, there was a big field between our house and Uncle David's house.  We always had horses that stayed in the field.  I remember setting off across the field, all by myself...well, I felt like I was all by myself and that field felt SO HUGE...but Uncle David was always watching me and waiting for me at the gate.  I can still see him standing there.  Uncle David was the first person to get me on a horse...and after I rode with him, I loved it.  I remember he came up to the house to get me...and I was going to ride down to Grannie and Papa's house with him.  Apparently, I had been in my Momma's make-up and Uncle David pitched such a fit about that red lipstick and how I had better not get ANY of that stuff on him.  I rode his motorcycle with him...and I remember going places in his El Camino.  I trusted him with my life.  I wasn't afraid of anything when I was with him.  When we moved to South Carolina, I was terribly sad to leave my family, especially my Uncle David.  I rode all the way to Myrtle Beach in the moving van with him.  Just me and him...all the way to South Carolina.  Finally, he became a father and I was so happy that he would get to experience that kind of love - and I love his daughter, Becky.  He would often tell my Grannie that Becky reminded him a lot of me when I was little.  As I grew older, I began to not only love my Uncle David, but to appreciate him.  As a college student, I found myself sending Father's Day cards to him...because next to my Daddy, he was like a father to me.  He told the funniest stories of his time serving as a deputy in a prison or about teaching his dogs not to tear up the Kleenex box.  Uncle David would tell stories and have me in stitches...crying my eyes out because I was laughing so hard.  I can still see the little smirk that he always had on his face and I can still hear his laugh.  I can see his blue eyes as he told a story...and he loved to pick on me!  He loved to grab my knee and say "horse eatin' corn, horse eatin' corn!"  He would hide the rice krispy treats from me before we got to Grannie and Papa's for Christmas and EVERY year, I started off my time in Georgia searching for those dang rice krispy treats.  My wedding video is the best - Uncle David dancing to the Hokey Pokey with Becky.  I was so glad that he was there to be a part of my special day.  He met Samuel - and he loved him.  There are a few pictures of them together.  I wish I would have known to take more.  I can still smell him sometimes...combination of leather and cigarette smoke...and even though cigarettes are terribly bad...that combination smells good to me because it reminds me of him.  I never got to tell Uncle David good-bye.  He was found in his home by some of his police deputy friends because he had not called into work.  He died alone.  That still rocks me to the core.  It breaks my heart, but it doesn't surprise me.  He didn't want anyone to worry about him, ever.  When I arrived in Georgia for the funeral, all my Papa could do was hug me and say through his tears "oh, he loved you so much."  Maybe that was his goodbye to me sent through my Papa.  When the family cleaned out Uncle David's house, they found the Father's Day card from that June and many of the notes that I had sent him through the years.  I loved that man.  I still cry and miss him.  I still wish that he would have seen his daughter graduate high school or met my David.  And yes, my David is named after my Uncle David...and my brother.  I couldn't think of a better name for my second born child...David Brandt.  My Uncle David would have been proud...and I am proud that God gave me such a special man to be an important part of my life.

Both of my parents have lost a sibling.  I can't begin to image the hurt that comes with that...but in times like these, when my mind and my heart take a stroll down memory lane, I choose to think of the precious, sweet memories.  The laughter.  The smiles.  The hugs. The love.  The blessings of my Aunt Susie and my Uncle David...how blessed I am for having them in my life for a short time on earth, but forever in my heart.